A winters day In a deep and dark december ...
If you've been reading my rather infrequent posts, you know that I recently got the Best of Simon and Garfunkle as part of my Best Of Extravaganza. It's spent some time in the car with me and I've found myself reflecting on how different the music sounds to me.
When I say different, I don't mean how much clearer everything is, how much I miss the hisses and pops from my old record or even that I'm catching lyrics I never heard correctly before (all of which is true). Rather, it's me that's differnt ... and nothing on the album typifies this more than 'I Am a Rock'.
... I am alone,
Gazing from my window to the streets below
On a freshly fallen silent shroud of snow.
I am a rock,
I am an island.
This song was an anthem for me. Yes, I knew that Paul was being ironic and sarcastic as he quoted John Donne ( ... no man is an island ... ), but I always took the lyrics to say, ha - you're wrong I can be an island!!!
Ive built walls, A fortress deep and mighty,
That none may penetrate.
I have no need of friendship; friendship causes pain.
Its laughter and its loving I disdain.
I am a rock,
I am an island.
This quite simply isn't me anymore. I don't think I'm altogether more healthy than I was .. maybe it's just experience that has taught me the value of friendships. Well, experience and a lot more practice.
Dont talk of love, But Ive heard the words before;
Its sleeping in my memory.
I wont disturb the slumber of feelings that have died.
If I never loved I never would have cried.
I am a rock,
I am an island.
Ok - this one was completely out of my league back then. There was a brief span of time in my Junior year (with the emotional maturity of a 12 year old girl) that I had the whole bemoaning love - not yet real - yet lost thing going on. But this just sounded cool and (to me) made for a good sensitive guy impression.
I have my books And my poetry to protect me;
I am shielded in my armor,
Hiding in my room, safe within my womb.
I touch no one and no one touches me.
I am a rock,
I am an island.
I used to think the lyric here was safe within my 'tomb' rather than womb. I still think that would sound cooler (is that a word?). The book and poetry bit is interesting to reflect on. It's kind of a chicken/egg thing. As I've gotten older (and less like the person in this song) the less I've spent time with books. I know that might surprise some of you - but I used to be even more bookish. Nowadays I'm limited to the shallow end of the pool: no philosphy, very little history, and God help me .... books on CD. The poetry is all but gone and just about everything I wrote buggs me more than a human video. I say all that to wonder outloud .... did I take on my bookishness as part of the persona of the 'island' or did my literary leanings coddle the persona. Either way, one or both were (at least partly) fake.
And a rock feels no pain;
And an island .... well, you know the rest.
8 comments:
Wow, something bothers you more then a human video? And it's something YOU wrote? All those cherrished treasures of yesteryear. All the "get to know me better, listen to my voice, hear me speak through the colors of the rainbow." You don't like them anymore?
I have to admit that I am shocked. I think the bookish you is still there. I think the poet is still there too. I think that you just are in a different part of your life now that doesn't reflect the things you once knew to be signs of a true poem. Now sadly your life reflects more the antics of a Sara Groves song! :) I've been painting pictures of Egypt....
You are more of taupe then a purple guy now. :)
So you have learned that no man is an island. Sounds like you have grown.
When I first saw the winter picture, I thought it was a Narnia scene and post.
Quite a bit of symbolism there.
"with the emotional maturity of a 12 year old girl."
They says girls mature faster than boys.
Oh yeah, is that a picture of what your back yard looks like right now? :)
get out a fat black pen and grab a napkin near by and let the words flow.
I want to meet this dashboard poet.
The lock is key.
The lock is key.
I am an island.
I am an island.
The island is me.
The island is me.
be nice to the others dash
I left the "e" out .... - couldn't be much nicer.
Dash - I too was a kindred spirit with this song and used it as an anthem. I too have grown and changed - realized that I don't need to avoid all pain by being an emotional island, but I still tend to do avoidance things when something makes me uncomfortable. I think I had the book thing going simultaneously with the song. I still read but it is different now. I own more books definitely. I wrote that poem I posted recently -- I never write poetry, so that's kind of weird. Maybe I'm having flashbacks.
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